Books Hold Stories – Weston

Books hold stories and this one is no exception. It is both the story of my artistic evolution over the course of this project, as well as a reflection on my darker feelings. 

When deciding how to hold a series of work such as the one I have created over senior project, a book felt like the best option for it. Earlier this year I experimented with book making in a poetry class. That book serves as a sort of forerunner to this one. I wanted to learn more about book binding inspired from my earlier attempt and thought it work perfectly with the narrative I has trying to depict.

The materials I decided to use to create this work both reflect the messages I wanted to express through them, as well as myself. The work in the pages utilizes stark contrast with an absence of shading and softer lifework. I wanted the contrast to continue in the pages themselves. So I decided to have alternating black and white pages with bold lines in a limited color pallet drawn over them.

My work revolves around a few core ideas and motifs. There are three symbols that appear repeatedly and were the most important elements I wanted to showcase.

The first is a self portrait. The portrait is not realistic or designed to mimic what I look like in person, but rather is an idealized image of myself. The portrait has a strong jawline and more toned features that while suggesting it is me, remains abstract.

The second major image is the rose. The symbolism of the rose is important to me. The rose symbolizes love and beauty, but also pain. Its petals are beautiful but its thorns are painful. Love can be beautiful, like the petals, but also costly and heartbreaking, like the stem.

The third symbol is the horseshoe crab. A lost and lonely me once walked down beach to find a horseshoe crab trapped in a tide pool left from the receding water. The horseshoe crab had traveled far down the bank of pool unable to find its way out and awaiting its death. When I found it I placed it back in the ocean where it crawled away. The horseshoe crab and I were similar that day, we both couldn’t find our way out of something. We were the only two things on the beach, and I felt especially connected to it in that experience. 

My influences stem mostly from other work I have created or dreams and images I carry with me in my head. The characteristics of the portrait were inspired by a self portrait photo I took. When I boosted the contrast, these lines and hard shadows appeared under my cheeks and lips due to the angle of my head. I felt that it spoke to me and wanted to create a drawn representation of it.

My work is an expression of myself. It shows a side of me that some may not know. I frequently struggle with feelings of depression and this work was both a way for me to express it, as well as work through it by putting it into a physical form.

My process for creating the work begins with sketches and warm up drawings. Typically I have an image or idea in my head and work it out on a piece of scrap paper that won’t be included in the work so that I am free to experiment and let ideas flow. Once I feel confident in the way I can render the image and feel what I am trying to express is coming through in it, I work it out on the actual page that will be included in the final. Over time I fill up these scrap pages, when I do I pin them to a wall so that I can look at them either for inspiration, or to get into the same mindset as a previous day. Sometimes I can see them in a different light and either improve upon them in a new drawing or come up with something completely new from the previous work.